Cycles in Relationships
All of life is based on cycles. If you really think about it, it’s true. The days and nights, the growth cycle of plants, the seasons, the tides, a woman’s menstrual cycle. Women in general seem to be more in tune with the cycles of life. They tend to go with the flow, and bring themselves into harmony with what is more easily than men. No judgment here. Just stating what is. And as always, I’m talking in general. Of course there are exceptions to every rule.
So how come, if this is true about cycles, that all of life is based on them, we seem to ...
Sympathy Sex
Many of us are, unfortunately, familiar with it, especially if we’ve been married. Sympathy sex, as it’s called, is the sex that we have out of a feeling of obligation to our partners. We have sympathy for their desire to have sex, even when we don’t want to, so we give in.
It’s also sometimes called “taking one for team”. I don’t recommend it, both for the sake of your personal well being and the well being of your relationship.
Some of you may be aware that in the “old days” men literally bought women on auction. What most people don’t ...
Texting Love
Lately I have been working on loving myself at a deeper level. I have been learning to love myself for like ten years, but now I am really digging my self-loathing out by the roots. Yes, we all have it, or some degree of it inside ourselves, even if we had a "good childhood", even if our parents did a "good job", it doesn't take much for us as infants and toddlers to get the idea that there is somehow something wrong with us, or that we are not good enough.
By the way, when I say "learning", what I really mean is remembering Who I Really Am. I am made in the ...
Today I Wept…
I have been reading the book Home with God by Neale Donald Walsch. (Sorry, Neale, the last time I wrote about you I totally hacked your name, but I figure a man like you will probably forgive.) It's the last in his Conversations with God series, in which he literally prints word for word his conversations with Source.
So I got to the part about how we ourselves create everything in our lives. I know this sounds hard to believe for some. There is really no man with a long white beard in the sky pulling our puppet strings. We have free will. We can co-create ...
Choosing “The Path Less Traveled”
Last week I blogged about whether you might be a “polymamorist”. Others choose what’s known as “swinging” over polyamory, which is having more than one sexual partner, without the relationship/love component.
If you’ve been thinking about either option in your partnership, you should know that opening up a relationship that has been “closed” is a complicated task. You don’t just talk about it once, say “well, glad that’s done”, and be on your merry way to multi-partnered bliss. No, it’s more like having that talk about sex with your child ...
You Might be a Polyamorist IF…
No, this is not like one of those jokes about rednecks. (“you might be a redneck IF”...). I’m serious. Polyamory is a word that was invented in the 90's to describe the practice of having a romantic relationship with more than one person at a time. Why would anyone choose to be polyamorous in the first place, and is it something you’d like to pursue yourself?
To give a few ideas, you may want to explore polyamory if:
-Monogamy has always felt unnatural for you.
-You want to be able to act on the deep attractions that come up for other people, not ...
Dance Recital Musings
Today I went to my daughter’s dance recital. Normally, I don’t look forward to three hours of consecutive entertainment, and today was no different. (I want to see my kid dancing, just not her and everyone else’s kid, for so long ) But even in the midst of my bad attitude, I started having some positive thoughts.
As I was sitting there looking into the faces of all these children, I started to think: each one of these human beings in front of me is one tiny wave on the sea of God. Each one of these kids represents a different flavor of God(dess).
Some were ...
Parting on Good Terms
It occurs to me lately that most of us have a great deal of trouble, once we realize that a relationship is over, leaving on good terms. It is as if we get amnesia for all the good things about our partners, all the reasons we were together in the first place, and only remember what is supposedly “wrong” with that person and why the breakup is occurring. It may be a six month relationship, or it may be a twenty year marriage. It doesn’t matter. It is still important, and absolutely possible, to patch things up before you depart.
Here are some important ...
Monogamy Revisited
Okay, so here’s the deal. I am not perfect. You’re really surprised by that, aren’t you? I am actually a work in progress, just like all of you and as such I may change my ideas about things from time to time, as I am about to do right now.
In a previous blog, I made an argument that we, as human beings, are not meant to be monogamous. Well, I have since found out more information on that. As some of you know, I am frequently exposed to channeling during our Sunday “meditation group”. We call it the meditation group, but that’s just to make ourselves ...
Soulmates and Twin Flames Defined
In our mainstream culture, many people believe that a soulmate is that one person on the planet that they’re destined to be with, romantically speaking. They meet someone and believe that person is their soulmate. At long last they have found the one. But then it doesn’t work out, in most cases, and they meet someone else. They were wrong. The first person wasn’t their soulmate, this person is. Sound familiar?
Well, I have good news and bad news about this. Most of the time, finding that one person, inheriting a castle, and living happily ever after ...