Adults Don’t Have to Explain Themselves
My teacher in life coaching school, Kathlyn Hendricks, used to say "adults don't have to explain themselves." I think it was some good advice. And, I'd add that there are exceptions.
In this case, I haven't reached out to all of you for about two and a half years. I want to share that during that time, both my husband and I experienced some devastating events, in both cases regarding our children. We are okay. And I made a decision not to continue writing my emails. I could have pushed through in a masculine energy sort of way and done that; yet I knew that what I ...
Dance Your Gratitude!
Yesterday, maybe you took a moment to reflect on what you’re thankful for. But why limit it to one day? Why not make it Thanksgiving week — or even a daily practice of gratitude and joy?
Discovering Gratitude Through Dance
This past Wednesday, I joined my weekly Biodanza class — a beautiful movement-based practice that connects body, emotion, and spirit. Our instructor invited us to “dance our gratitude.” The music began, and I let my movements flow naturally.
Without words, my dance became a prayer of thanks for the entire past year — for the ...
I Felt Blissful with the Flu
It may sound impossible — feeling blissful while sick with the flu. But it truly happened, and now I understand the reason behind it.
The last time I got the flu was also the last time I received a flu shot, over 20 years ago. I remember lying in bed, feeling utterly miserable — not just physically but emotionally too. I was recently divorced and alone, with no one to take care of me. The added self-pity — thinking, “why me?” — only amplified the suffering.
Going Toward the Pain Instead of Resisting
During life coaching school, I learned a transform...
How to Come Like a Woman
The way most of us learned to come is what I would call the masculine way, rather than learning how to come like a woman. In fact, most heterosexual sex, at least in this culture, is done in a very masculine way. The masculine is goal-oriented. It is direct.
It gets right to the point in most cases. There might be a little foreplay- kissing, breasts, pussy, intercourse. Or there might not. It can happen pretty quickly. And there is a lot of tightening up of the body that leads up to orgasm. These are all masculine ways of doing things. I was no different.
I used to ...
Equality Rising Beyond Patriarchy
Hello Friend,You know how I'm always talking about dismantling the patriarchy? Well, if you don’t know, I definitely am. It’s one of those topics that lives close to my heart because it shapes so much of how women experience the world.
Some feminists say things are still terrible and that sexism is everywhere. And honestly, they’re not wrong — sexism does still exist in big and small ways. But I also hold what might be an unpopular opinion: things are getting better. Not perfect, but better. I really believe we’re seeing more progress, more awareness, and ...
I Find a Partner Without Trying
Have I Ever Told You This Story? When clients tell me they want to find a partner, I don't advise that they go on dating sites. It's simply not necessary. Here's how I find my "person" and how being in circulation in the world is essential, but not being on dating sites.
The Moment I Stopped Searching
I wasn't looking for a partner. The truth is I had finally come to the place in my life as a single person. I said: "If I am single for the rest of my life I will still be happy." And I was happy!
That is the real key. Not to try.
By "trying" to find a partner, ...
I Knew It: Patriarchy and Sacred Sexuality
Hello Friend,
Don't you love it when science proves something that you already "knew"? The past couple of days I've been listening to a replay of a master class given by Layla Martin. In case you don't know who she is, she's one of the world's leading experts on sacred sexuality. And she focuses on women — helping them reconnect with their bodies and reclaim their feminine power through sacred sexuality practices.
The Patriarchy and Women's Suppressed Power
I have had a knowing for years now that the reason women are not showing up in the world as the amazing ...
Can You Believe This?
I know I've mentioned this before, AND I continue to realize how amazing it is that my OB/GYN, who has likely examined many THOUSANDS of yonis, was impressed with how juicy my 59-year-old yoni is!
Let me back up. I've been doing a daily self yoni massage on and off (mostly on) for about a year now. And even though I've been paying attention for years, and I've gotten most of my menopausal symptoms under control, I still had a fair amount of vaginal dryness that required me to sometimes use lube when having sex.
And THEN I started doing my daily self yoni massage!
...
How to Enjoy Your Life More
Whenever something comes up for me, I also know that if I share it, others can benefit from it too.
I know many of us tend to think we're unique, including me. The fact is, I know that if I'm going through a "thing," there's a very high chance I'm not the only one. None of us is as unique as we might like to think we are. ;)
Here's the thing: I have had, for decades, a tendency to make myself too busy.
What's this all about? For one, the patriarchy has taught those of us in our society that to be productive is not only good, it's required. We're taught we aren't ...
What You May Not Know About ED
ED, or erectile dysfunction, is the most common reason that lingam-owning individuals contact me for help.
First, I want to emphasize this point: almost every person with a lingam will experience erectile dysfunction at some point in their life. Some common causes are fatigue and alcohol.
I am telling you this because I see a lot of shame with the individuals with ED that I work with, so I just want to normalize it and let you know that you are not even close to being alone with this issue.
Whether your ED started because of a very benign issue such as being ...
Science Backs This Up!
Last week I went in to have my annual pelvic exam. Sexy, right?
Well, it LEADS to something really sexy, so read on!
My practitioner and I had been talking about hormones and how things are working in my yoni. When she started the internal exam, she commented on how wet my yoni was. And it wasn't because I was turned on! Of course, she didn't say "wet" or "yoni", but I'm paraphrasing — that's what she meant.
Immediately, I had the thought to tell her about my daily yoni massage practice obviously being the reason why, at 59 and almost 60, my yoni IS much wetter ...
Do Yonis Smell Bad?
When I was in college I had one boyfriend, who had experience with very few other yonis, who told me that women have two kinds of yonis: the kind that smell horrible and the kind that don't. And he mentioned numerous times that he was so glad that I had the "good" kind of yoni.
(Of course, I'm sure he didn't really use the word yoni, and I didn't even know that word at the time either.)
Being as inexperienced as I was with other women's yonis back in those days, I believed him. Why wouldn't I have? He was the one who had been up close and personal with other yonis, ...
The Secret to Riding the Waves
I have a long-time client that may have had the worst life I've ever heard of. And she is one of the most courageous people I know.
If she were here, she would probably tell you I saved her life. But I know the truth: She saved her life.
She came up with a phrase to describe where she wants to be in her life. To her, it means not focusing on the traumatic past or the scary future, but just being right here, right now. It's the best thing she has come up with. And it works when she has those tough times.
For all of us, the traumas of our lives never quite leave ...