Afraid to “Like” Me?
Through a number of recent conversations with friends, I have come to realize that there are likely a lot fewer people out there who "like" me (on Facebook, social media) than those who like me. And these are real, actual friends I am talking about, not social media "friends". If even my friends are thinking of the consequences to their careers and families, for example, of publicly acknowledging their viewpoints, I can only imagine what it is like for those that do not even know me.
I get it. I'm sure I've done the same thing: not "liked" something on Facebook, ...
My Dating Experiment
So yesterday I broke one of my own "rules"; not that I really have rules. ;)
I have been telling my clients for years that they do not need to join dating sites in order to find a partner. All they have to do is get out of the house once in a while. If their soul and their future partner's soul planned to meet, it will happen. Online dating not needed.
And then I was essentially alone, for like eight months. And I WAS getting out of the house. And then I got sick of not having a regular partner to do and share things with. And I don't mean just friend...
Embracing “Imperfectionism”
It has been years that I have been working on becoming a "perfectionist in recovery"- a former perfectionist who has loosened things up a bit, who recognizes it is okay for me to be less than perfect, and it doesn't mean that I am unlovable. It means that I am human. The more I worked toward that goal, the less fault I would find with others, too. It's a package deal; the way we feel about ourselves is the way we feel about others.
I can't say I understand what tipped the balance for me. Maybe it was the little steps toward more and more self-love I have taken ...
Advanced Nippling
Yep, I've done it again. Made up my own word. Nippling (v.)- the art of providing physical pleasure via the nipples.
It occurs to me that the nipple is an under-appreciated aspect of the human anatomy, when it come to sexual pleasure. Mostly in women, yet some (about 50%, according to my informal poll) men enjoy it too.
Okay, let me just be blunt here. HUGE GENERALIZATION ALERT: Guys who are attracted to women, I know you love the pussy. The pussy, aka yoni, is the source of most of your personal pleasure. Yes, I get it.
AND, did you know that many ...
Transcending the Ego
This summer has been the summer of intense experiences. Intensely challenging experiences in some ways, which have led to intensely ecstatic experiences.
I'm running four to five miles at a time while going at a faster pace than I've been used to. I'm at the dentist's office, in excruciating pain- for hours. I'm lying on a table, getting needles repeatedly stuck into me. For hours. On skin this is inflamed and red already. (Yes, I am getting a new tattoo. I am not THAT much of a masochist.) ;)
We all find ourselves in extremely challenging circumstances ...
The Wisdom of Kink
In and out of my professional life, one of the most common couples' issues I see is that one or both partners lose interest in sex.
However, I cannot think of one KINKY couple I've encountered for whom lack of sexual desire is an issue.
So, what's the solution? Everyone turn kinky? NO! It's not for everyone. (In fact I had one woman who responded to last week's blog by saying that she can't even picture "kink" and "sacred" in the same sentence. And that's okay.)
The solution COULD be, however, to look at what is different in kinky relationships that ...
The Sacredness of Kink
Yes, you heard me right. Kink is sacred.
Well, let me back up a minute. For those of you who don't know what "kink" is. Think "Fifty Shades of Grey", minus the abusive, traumatized sociopath. Okay- bad example ;). Think BDSM (bondage, discipline, sadism, and masochism). Think dom and sub (dominant and submissive). Got it?
Okay, so here's the thing. Some people, including mental health professionals and even those who say they specialize in sacred sexuality, think kink is abusive. Let's clear this up. SOME people, such as the fictional Christian ...
Growing Pains
So, do you remember when you were a kid and you would get those "growing pains"- like when your body was literally growing so fast that it hurt? Well, I've been thinking that those pains don't only pertain to kids. And they're not only about physical growing.
The other day I was feeling kind of down, and I ended up realizing that it wasn't really sadness I was feeling- it was fear. And I landed on the source of the uneasiness, which was that I am going through (and have been going through) so many changes, so much growth. I started to do some writing about it, ...
Me, Me, Me, Me, Me
Every once in a while I get someone on Facebook who makes a really negative comment on one of my threads. I don't usually attract that sort of thing, and when I do I tend to delete it, as I'm not interested in negativity, and want to keep things loving and positive if I can.
About a month ago, I had posted about being on t.v. And one of my Facebook "friends" wrote "me, me, me, me, me" as a response. I did delete it. And then, it got me thinking. There are a couple of noteworthy thoughts I had in particular.
First is- yes, ME. It is so taboo in our culture ...