I just co-hosted a workshop on self lingam massage. And I’m currently making a video series on yoni massage, both self yoni massage and yoni massage with a partner.
The other day, I was doing some work on the video series (don’t worry, lingam-owning individuals, I will make a video series for you too) and I thought to myself: Here I am recommending that EVERYONE do either a self lingam or self yoni massage practice for self-care…and I’m not even doing one!
I won’t go into the self-judgements and the part where I told myself I was a hypocrite, etc. Well, I guess I just did… 😉
Again, for those of you who need a review or don’t know, sacred spot massage is an ancient tantric practice that has been virtually lost to the world. It is a healing practice and can help with overall health, genital health, self-esteem, insomnia, fatigue, depression, and all sorts of sexual challenges, just to name a few. Yoni means “sacred space” in Sanskrit, and lingam means “wand of light.” You get the gist.
I am currently doing one of my “living and working in_______” trips, in Paris for three weeks. Today is one of my scheduled workdays. And guess what? My first order of business was to give myself a yoni massage. Now, this is the type of work I can get into!
And I don’t plan on doing it just once! That would be like what I’ve been warning my lingam-owning clients about: Don’t just take the workshop and then never practice again. It will just end up being another cool workshop you did one time. Instead, commit to a daily self-loving practice of sacred spot massage.
As of today, that’s what I’ll be doing. I’ve decided that every day at 3 pm I’ll be giving myself a yoni massage. And I’m considering it part of my research for my work.
After having only done it once, I’ve already learned several things:
- It can feel hard to be vulnerable, even with oneself. I noticed I had resistance to beginning, but I did it. I say this because if YOU decide to start a daily yoni or lingam massage practice, you’ll know to have compassion for yourself.
- It really calls for a gentle touch at times. Mostly over a period of about twenty years, I’ve done sacred spot massage on friends to practice, and on demonstration partners at workshops. I know I’ve taken care to be gentle with them, but with myself I was being too rough at first, and that didn’t feel as self-loving as it could have. So, be self-loving if you decide to try it. There’s always time to increase pressure later if that’s what feels good.
- I too have “stuff” to release. We all do. Particularly one spot when I was doing the internal part of the massage was tender. What is this? It’s stuck energy—some kind of feeling/thought that got stuck in the body and still needs to be released. This doesn’t need to be done all at once, in a day. I gently massaged there for a couple of minutes, intending to release stuck energy, and moved on. Just because I’m a sacred spot massage teacher, and hundreds of people have learned these techniques from me, doesn’t mean I don’t have my OWN stuff to release. It’s normal, and that’s what I want you to know.
- It feels good to have done this for myself today; it is a start toward walking my talk more. It is a means to loving my own yoni more. Just as I have learned to love my own body more through spending so much of my time naked at home, I had the sense that I am already able to love my yoni more through touching it in this practice.
- I guess I already knew this part technically, but there is a potential bonus to self sacred spot massage practice. Once you’re done, and if you’re in the mood for more self-pleasuring, you can enjoy that too as a separate event. I treated myself to a couple of orgasms. It may not be so for you, but for me, it is a rarity to masturbate these days. As my sex drive has naturally declined since menopause, and I am getting my fill of partnered sex, I don’t do it often. And it was lovely to remember the joys of self-pleasure, which from a very young age has been part of my self-love practice.
Have no idea how to do self yoni or lingam massage? Fear not. I just did a workshop for men on this and will be offering it again. Very soon, I will be announcing my November workshop for yoni-owning folks who want to learn self yoni massage.
The way sacred spot massage works is that the more past trauma and stuck energy are released from the body, the more pleasure is available to us. I’ll keep you posted on how my journey is going from time to time.