A Sparkly Star

Here’s a poem I wrote some time ago, that I got the impulse to share today.  Maybe some of you can relate.  We all have different parts of ourselves.

                                                                             A Sparkly Star

I came with my case of toilet paper
And my case of paper towels
And toddler wipes, to keep the buttocks clean, but of course not to clog the toilet with
I came trying to put on the face of order
And:
‘It’s all under control
I’m organized
I do things the smart way, can’t you see?’
And,
‘You should strive to be more like me’
I came as a terrified little girl
‘Am I sure I’m ready for this?
What if he sees through?
That inside I am not so sure of myself
And echoes of Mom still play in my head:
You’re not good enough
You’re not wanted here
You’re doing it wrong
There’s simply something bad about you, that’s all you need to know’
The road for the Organized Woman and the Scared Little Girl is rough
I am strong, clear, on the ball, on top of it all
Savvy, and, not small
I am big, I am IT, I am seen, I am heard, I am loved
I am Love
PERIOD.
Yes, all of that, and
I am weak, I am scared, I am tight, I am the closed bud
I am meek, I am confused
I lose myself
I compare myself,
I am not it
PERIOD.
Thank you
My Boo
For being a place where I can show up as a queen
And as a wretch
‘You’re a mess’, you say, in the kindest, most comical way
And you are right
‘You are a Goddess and a queen’, you say
And you are right
Someway, somehow
Through it all
Through the terror and the bliss
And the sickness and the ecstasy
And the dread and the forgiveness
Somehow, through it all
You help me see
Oh wait, I help me see…
ME
More clearly than ever before
I am a sparkly star
I grow to remember this more often
Even when I am witnessing myself not remembering-
I am remembering
Are you magical?
Yes and no
Am I magical?
Yes and no
It depends which ‘me’ I choose to be
You are my mirror, my perfect reflection
Of Divinity and humanity
And I see
More clearly than ever before…
I am a sparkly star

                                                                                  __________________________

IF YOU’D LIKE TO LEARN MORE ABOUT HOW YOU CAN GET BACK TO A PLACE OF MORE PASSIONATE LOVE AGAIN, sign up for a free Connection Call with me HERE.

AAAAAND, GUESS WHAT?  I have a new Facebook group, The Turned on Woman.  It is for women aged 40+ who have lost their joie de vivre, so to speak, and want to feel turned on again.  I provide lots of free content there as well as opportunities for discussion in a safe, private space.  If you fit this category, please ask to join HERE.