You’re Welcome

By now you’ve all heard the common self-love building technique of saying “thank you” (rather than deflecting) when someone gives you a compliment, right?  Well, although I do recommend following that advice, this blog is about remembering to say “you’re welcome”.

Have you noticed that many times when someone thanks you for something, anything, you don’t actually say “you’re welcome”?  I have.  Maybe it’s gone out of style or something.  Someone texts me a paragraph, and within it are the words “thank you”.  I respond to the text, but ignore the thanks.  Another possible response is “think nothing of it” or “it was nothing”.  Really?  Doesn’t that invalidate both the person who is expressing gratitude, and yourself for having done a good deed?  I used to have a friend that said “think everything of it.”  At least that was funny.  Sometimes I  just say “no problem”.  Well, that is an acknowledgement that the person has thanked me, at least.

You’ve probably guessed by now that I value politeness.  I think it can express how we value ourselves and other people.  When my daughter and I traveled to Spain a couple of years ago, just about the only thing I liked less about Spain than America was this:  almost no one says thank you there, let alone you’re welcome.  We were like the only ones in the country, it seemed, going around thanking everyone.  They probably thought we were freaks. 😉  Even here at home, when my daughter and her friends were younger, if I bought one of them an ice cream, took them out to dinner, or gave them a ride, there were kids that acknowledged it and thanked me and those that just said “bye” and slammed the car door.  I’ve become more aware of “conscious languaging” lately- the art of consciously choosing the words we choose to create the desired results.  One of my desired results in life, always, is to help myself and others to love themselves and each other more, and I think I am on to something when it comes to the politeness thing.

Let’s talk about why I have been in the process of developing the habit of saying “you’re welcome”.  First, as mentioned above, it acknowledges the person that thanked me, whether it was electronically or in person. And that acknowledgement is loving.  It also shows that I am graciously accepting of the person’s thanks.  And lastly, think for a moment about what it actually means.  You’re welcome.  You are welcome to the thing that I just gave you (the favor, the material object, the compliment, whatever it may be). It implies this:  I willingly, with an open heart, chose to do this thing for you and I actually took pleasure in it.  Isn’t that a kind, loving thing to say to someone?  Of course, I don’t recommend saying “you’re welcome” if you don’t mean it.  If you did something “nice” for someone else because you felt obligated to, or because you were afraid the person would be mad if you didn’t say it, it really won’t do either of you any good to say “you’re welcome.”

I know being polite can sometimes be thought of as a little thing.  However, if we are striving to create a better world, all the “little things” can go a long way.